Wednesday 3 September 2014

The Elephant in the Room

















I often wonder why it is that people do not, or cannot, speak openly about Depression or Mental health issues. If you walk out your door any day of the week you will meet people who will openly tell you about their Operations, Procedures, Bunions, Gout, Cysts, or whatever plethora of what ails them! They don't shy away from showing you their scars, spots, nips or tucks, but what about those emotional and mental scars which remain hidden, such as Depression or Mental illness? why is it, that even in 2014 we are all so afraid of talking about this Silent killer?

I wonder if it has something to do with our relationship and great fear of the Unknown? Human beings have a tendency of shrinking away from such uncomfortable matters, which they can neither see nor feel. Is it the fear surrounding loss of control? The concept of losing control of ones' Mind or sense of Self in any way, shape, or form, surely is terrifying to many.  Possibly the last frontier the human race has yet to explore more comprehensively, yet this can only be done through awareness and education. It is also interesting and worth questioning how different cultures perceive Mental illnesses and Depression within society. This can also determine or affect what treatment or support is supplied, but indeed can stigmatize the illness further.

The judgement for so long has been on those who suffer from mental illness or depression, that they are somewhat weaker than those who do not directly suffer, their inability to cope with life, sometimes seasoned with a little blame by society. Nobody wants to admit to this if they believe they run the risk of being labeled as weak in some way. It should not be the Elephant in the room. It has just as much to do with those who do not suffer directly as it does with those who suffer. In a Utopian world nobody would suffer in silence. Why are mental illnesses, such as Depression not perceived the same way as physical illnesses and disabilities? What the eye cannot see somehow seems to equate to a whole different perception- if we cannot see you are bleeding, then how can you claim to be hurt ?

We All suffer from some form of Depression at some stage of our lives even if not chronic or clinical. According to the World Health Organisation" It is estimated that one in four people in the world will be affected by mental or neurological disorders at some point in their lives" that is a phenomenal statistic! "with an estimated 350 million people affected by depression " and " Around the world, almost one million people die due to suicide every year, and it is the third leading cause of death among young people ".  (WHO http://www.who.int/mediacentre/factsheets/fs369/en/ )

Depression comes in many forms, ranging from the mild which most people suffer from at some stage in life, due to difficult life situations which bring them down,will cause mood fluctuations, loss of interest in things and appetite, becoming withdrawn etc, to the more serious chronic  forms of depression which causes a physiological change in the body, such as Clinical, Bi-polar, SAD etc..
Some may not even be aware they are suffering from depression . Telling someone to 'snap out of it', or to simply 'get a grip' or 'toughen up' is always counter-productive. We have all heard it bandied about, some of us may even be guilty of uttering those very words!  It usually stems from ignorance and a lack of education, awareness and experience, or in a minority of cases a lack of empathy.
I believe none of us are perfect, therefore, before criticising another think! As the old Native American Cherokee proverb goes :  Don’t judge a man until you have walked a mile in his shoes".
  
Many people struggle to understand how highly intelligent, well educated, outgoing, creative, successful people could possibly struggle with any of the above? Yet, it moves in all circles and can affect each and everyone of us !

In the aftermath of the death of Robin Williams, we should all question our attitudes towards Depression and Mental Illness. Is there a lesson to be learned here ?

When a loved one dies of cancer, what do we do? We often get angry. We raise money. We hold fundraisers and events to highlight awareness and yell, "Fuck you, cancer!  We're not taking this lying down! You're not going to take another one of our family or friends!"

So why can't we do that for Depression? and Depression is definitely one demon that needs to have its Ass kicked! So, with this in mind let me leave you with these thoughts - Let us please take depression very seriously, in ourselves and in others. If in ourselves, let us speak about our pain openly, let us not be limited by childhood conditioning into hiding our anguish, or of being shamed into silence. And if in others, let us find the patience and compassion to hear that pain, to invite it to exist without judgment and without blame. Share it on. Lots of love.  - AM

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